Hospital Goblins

Hospitals are plagued by several goblins.  These goblins make the nurse's job difficult.

Here are a few of the more common goblins:

THE PAGER GOBLIN

When a nurse pages a doctor and gets no return call, we often hear later, "I didn't get that page".  The Pager Goblin has been at work!

THE TRANSPORT GOBLIN

This goblin is most commonly seen right at shift change. The off going nurse says, "Oh!  This intubated patient needs to be taken for an MRI scan of the chest/abdomen/pelvis!  I didn't see that order.  Can you take them?"

THE TANGLED LINE GOBLIN

This goblin comes into the patient's room and knots the monitor cables, IV tubing, foley, flexiseal, CRRT lines and balloon pump catheter into a ball.  The nurse untangles the mess, but the goblin sneaks in and weaves them together again.

THE MISSING LAB GOBLIN

A nurse draws a patient's blood, puts it into a tube, labels it and sends it to the lab.  Then, the nurse waits.  And waits.  And waits...

Time passes.  The polar ice caps recede.  A new president is elected.  Mars is colonized.

Finally, the nurse calls the lab to check on when--or if--the result might be posted.  The lab technician says cheerfully, "We didn't get that sample!"

This is the Missing Lab Goblin at work.